I have gone over this post over and over. Typing and deleting words, sentences, paragraphs even. At one point I was almost ready to hit publish, and I turned around and deleted this thing.
I also realize that it has been a hot minute since I have written anything. I have had a few things going on, and I need to make more of a habit to write. It is a learning process, that is for sure.
I want to be pretty upfront about this post, it will reference COVID-19 (coronavirus). I am not going to focus on social distancing, toilet paper, stocks, politics, or blah blah blah. So no, I am not going to give into all the drama, but it will be referenced and some information will be brought into my thoughts, because let’s face it, it is everywhere.
So now to my thoughts.. oh boy, here we go!
So the world is in chaos, which brings a lot of uncertainty. Now for those of you who know me, or those that will get to know me, will know that I am a planner. I like to know when things happen, and how they will happen. I like to plan things and take the lead on projects, plan parties, set up details for vacations, and such. Crossing the t’s and dotting the i’s are things that usually just come pretty natural to me. So now that the world is not normal, my world has been in shambles. My anxiety has been sky high, pretty much about anything and everything.
Sleeping has been a little rough, especially my dream time. I am one of the few people that seem to remember their dreams every night. The dreams, lately, have ranged from me waking up in tears, terrified, anxious, and a few just plain confusing ones. This is relating back to the emotions that I have been feeling lately about my life (and the world). Some of the dreams have me asking myself what is happening in my head? but some of them have me asking what was the importance of that dream? I have been known to have a few dreams that came true in some shape or form, so sometimes I am left wondering if there was any truth in the dreams I’ve had.
So, my anxiety has had many different triggers lately. I mean, I realize that mostly everyone has some kind of anxiety or has been feeling anxious lately (and if you have not, consider yourself blessed).
Even though my school district is on spring break right now, the whole state (and nation) is under strict orders to close all schools (indefinitely). This allows me to not physically be at school and lets me be home with the witch baby. This is kind of ironic to me, because I was never able to take my maternity leave in the beginning of the year, because I needed to be at work to make money, and it would have been too difficult to miss the beginning of the school year. So I am taking this chaotic time as a blessing in disguise (the light). [That was not meant to offend anyone, I am not that senseless. I realize the reasoning behind the school closures is a terrible thing, this was just my personal benefit of the closing.] Being at home, while unsure of what is going on in the homes of my students has my mind constantly racing. Not knowing how I will be able to provide instruction to those kids, who need an education as much as the next person. There are just so many factors that there are to consider, with a situation that is so fluid. There are so many unknowns, plans that have changed, different options as a result from the change, important decisions that need to be made in a short time frame. This has my planning mind in a frenzy, because I am not really able to be a part of the decision making and I am hearing information that is ever changing.. change is a very hard thing for me. I will always adapt, but getting my mind to comprehend the change is something that is hard for me to do.. but I can always fake it until I make it.
There are so many rumors circulating online, with friends, with family. It is hard to hear all of these theories as to what is going to happen, because for every theory, my mind plays out about 100 different scenarios.
I have been working on a lot of different strategies to ground myself to this earth and stay out of my mind. I am always a person to preach to someone else that they need to stay out of their mind, but following my own advice is not something I do well.
Well, because my mind goes about 1000 miles a minute, I am always coming up with some ‘off-the-wall’ ideas. So I have this idea, and take it for what you will, but I mean sometimes you realize that there are too many dots that connect to make something a coincidence. Maybe this is just a way that my mind has wandered to try and make something rational out of something I can not quite wrap my brain around.
So here is where my mind has drifted to..
The English translation of the Spanish word corona, is crown. Crowns have a lot of different connotations associated with it. Yes, a crown is something that you wear on your head. Many times it is pictured as gold, with some jewels on it, and some kind of royalty is wearing it. The dictionary also tells me that it is a sign of victory or honor. The other thing that comes to my mind is the crown chakra (Sahasrara).
Now the definition of a chakra can be a little confusing to explain, and you pretty much have to be a believer in these things, otherwise it is just going to sound like something completely made up. But the best definition I found for a chakra, comes from the OneTribe website.
Chakras are the circular vortexes of energy that are placed in seven different points on the spinal column, and all the seven chakras are connected to the various organs and glands within the body. These chakras are responsible for disturbing the life energy, which is also known as Qi or Praana.OneTribe.com
The top chakra that floats right above your head is called the crown chakra. Now, I have been thinking a little bit about this… ok I lied, I think a lot about this. The crown chakra is associated with a full understanding of the self, and connection with the higher, Devine, power of the universe. When this chakra is open, you have a sense of understanding that there is something more, than just this physical world. When it is closed, or blocked, you may feel some sort of isolation, emotional disruptions, and a disconnect from the world, people, or even yourself.
So now to analyze that a little more..
The key terms that have stuck out to me are isolation, disconnect, and disruption (but I am thinking on more than just an emotional level). Right now, this Earth is going through its own isolation and disruption. The Earth is showing all of the signs of having a blocked crown chakra… hence the coronavirus.
Now I realize that to the majority of you, I am going to seem pretty loca, but just roll with me for a minute.. but then again, I may lose some of you in all of this, but just humor me and read through this..
What if the Earth is a living thing, and has these chakras of its own? It has become infected with pollution, hate, and disaster. The Earth has become so out of tune with itself. It is trying to purge the bad out of itself.. the bad being the human race. Now I don’t think the human race is completely bad, but if you look at the damage done to Earth.. it is because of humans. We have not necessarily created all disasters, but we, as a human race, have done things like – created toxic chemicals, nuclear bombs, cut down precious trees for selfish greed. We have hate in our hearts. Now some of us, try to move past the hate, and focus on the love and light, but regardless, that hate exists. We have polluted this Earth’s land, water, and air – the very whole of the Earth is tainted on all fronts, by humans.
This new epidemic I do not think is meant to kill us off of the Earth. I believe that we were meant to be here. For what? I am not sure of that yet.. but never the less, I believe that this new pandemic is here as a warning. A last warning
We as a human race have become so obsessed with the newest thing, working all the time, not paying attention to what is truly important. We are always on the go, and never taking a moment to really just stop and appreciate all the things we already have around us.
We are now forced to stay at home and only leave for the essentials. We are not over-working ourselves (except those that are forced to work – health care, grocery stores, food services, etc. – you are so appreciated, especially in this time of need). We are spending time with our families, making meals at home. We are focusing the essentials, what we are founded on.
This is not to say that we should only leave for essentials and only be cave dwellers, but it has given us a moment to pause and enjoy these simple things.
This has been uncomfortable for most, because it feels like we have our freedom taken away. It isn’t gone, but it is a moment to say, just breath and look at what can happen when you take a break, and just pause.
Waters have cleared up, animals have returned to their native homes, smog has cleared from cities, the world is cleansing. Unfortunately it is coming with illness and death and illness.
Getting back to the chakras… maybe this is happening because the Earth is trying to unblock that crown (corona) chakra. Now I have just begun this spiritual journey, so I am no expert, but there are certain ways to open up a chakra – specifically the crown.
Some physical symptoms of a blocked chakra are: exhaustion, chronic tension headaches, poor coordination. Mentally, it shows itself in more of a depressive state – confusion, lack of inspiration or want to do anything, wanting to sleep all the time, disconnecting, and other self-destructing behaviors.
Now, I know that no one asked me, but if you did, I would say that Earth is exhibiting a lot of those kinds of behaviors to itself. We are all part of Earth – plants, animals, water, air, everything! We are confused about what is going on, self-destructing behaviors happen more often than we can count, and we have disconnected. Plain and simple. Disconnection is something that we have done far too often, on far too many levels.
Ask yourself – have you ever stayed at work later to just finish a job quick (that was not critical), when you could have went home to spend more time with family or a loved one? Have you just decided to text someone, instead of call them.. or better yet, see them in person? Have you been walking alone and decided that you would rather just play on your phone than have to make awkward eye contact and maybe do something, like… smile? This list could go on and on.
How can we fix it? This is something that I have been thinking about often. This is where my mind really has been going crazy. Now, I am not claiming to have all of the answers, or cures to the horrific illnesses that are out there, but I do have an idea of how we can control the future and help the Earth heal – like it is pleading to do.
Purple is the color associated with this chakra, but in my head when I focus on this chakra, I see white with purple tones. (Maybe that only makes sense to me?) Anyways, I think focusing on this color is something that helps me get more in tune with my own crown chakra.. something that is not quite open, but I have made progress on it. (If you want someone who can do some reiki and tell you about your chakras, I know a guy – even does long distance.)
I think that if we get back to focusing on our spiritual side, we can achieve great things. Now this does not have to be religious and bring in your God(s) that you worship, but it could. “A return to God‘ (I use that word loosely to describe any and all -or no- religious figures.) If we focus on the greater power of the universe, we will find what it is that is so important to us. We can focus on the light and healing.
I think those are the real key words: light and healing.
If we focus on healing, great things will come. Not only do we have to heal ourself, but everything around us. We need to heal the lands that have been destroyed. Heal the water that has been contaminated. Heal the hearts and souls of those we have encountered. Now I am not asking you to clean every piece of plastic out of the oceans (but if you want to – go for it). What I am asking you to do, is do good.
Be the good. Focus on the good. Focus on the light. Now I am not asking you to look down that tunnel of light that brings you to the other side, but focus on that positive, the good. In every single situation, there is some kind of good. It may not make itself apparent right away, but you will always be able to look back and find that silver lining in a dark cloud.
If you have made it this far in reading, thank you. This post is one that I did not intend on writing, but as time has gone on, I really needed to say my piece. I am not sure what your reaction will be to all of this, but please, share them with me. You might think that I am 100% right (doubtful) but you may also feel like I belong in the crazy house (probably).. but share those thoughts with me. I absolutely love all of the feedback that I have received from all of you.
Thank you. Be safe.